Darlings the weather has officially turned. The heating is on and we are all feeling full of the joys of Autumn in \u2018The Essex\u2019 household at the moment. In dating terms, this time is called ‘Cuffing Season’. It means a time when singles come together for the warm winter months as cuddles and cosy nights in replace the pub gardens and parties of the summer.<\/p>\n
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If you are ready to find someone this Autumn \/ Winter season its important you know the all-important do\u2019s and don\u2019ts. So here are my top 5 red flags that you should never<\/em> ignore!<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 1 – THEY DESCRIBE ALL THEIR EXES AS \u201cCRAZY\u201d<\/p>\n Read between the lines, if someone says all <\/em>their exes are crazy, the common factor here is them. Usually, it really means they themselves lied, cheated, gaslit and generally didn\u2019t make their partners feel safe and so they became jealous or controlling or argumentative aka \u201ccrazy\u201d. It is extremely likely you will be joining the ranks of the \u201ccrazy\u201d ex club when you get fed up with their bad behaviour too! Don\u2019t waste your time. Get out now while you still can; I bet all of their exes wish they could have seen the red flags and steered clear.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 2 – THEY DON\u2019T LISTEN TO YOU<\/p>\n It’s easy to let this trait go in the beginning and passing it off as nerves or excitement if someone talks over you. But you have to ask yourself, \u201chow does this person show they care about what\u2019s important to me?\u201d & “how much of my life do they really know?\u201d Not feeling listened to in the beginning is likely to build into a bigger resentment later down the line. If you have raised the subject and asked them to be more attentive and they show a short-term improvement before going back to how it was, it\u2019s likely you will break up anyway – so save the heartache and don\u2019t ignore the red flag.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 3 – THEY PUT YOU DOWN EVEN IN JEST<\/p>\n Words hurt and even if they say \u201cit was only a joke\u201d it doesn\u2019t erase the hurt in your heart. Your true love wouldn\u2019t want to hurt you, so if they dismiss your pain and continue to do it, then say you are being too sensitive and try to blame you, it\u2019s time to call it a day. You are supposed to be a team and teams don\u2019t deliberately each other with their words, especially if they have been told how much it hurts already.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 4 – THEY RESPOND POORLY WHEN YOU TAKE TIME AWAY FROM THEM<\/p>\n In the beginning it can feel lovely and flattering even but that will fade and if they still continue to pout, guilt trip you or make you feel bad for spending time away, that is a huge red flag. Spending too much time with the person you are dating is not good. Even if you want to be with them all the time it is better to take time away. If they are struggling when you take time for yourself it usually means they have abandonment issues or displaying traits of possessiveness. Unless they are working on it or willing to work on it you don\u2019t stand much chance of a healthy long-term relationship and there isn\u2019t anything you can do, it\u2019s on them to work on themselves.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n 5 – THEY ARE AT A DIFFERENT STAGE IN THEIR LIFE<\/p>\n We have all heard the saying ‘right person, wrong time\u2019 and sometimes it\u2019s totally true. If you are not on the same page, it\u2019s not going to work. If you are ready to settle down and start a family and they are ready to quit their job and go travelling around Mexico, this isn\u2019t your person. Morals and values have to match if you stand a chance at a long-term relationship.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Bonus tip – If you are dating online and their profile doesn\u2019t match. Obviously if the picture doesn\u2019t match then run don\u2019t walk from that date, but, even if the picture does match up, sometimes people write things that they think will show their best self and turns out is an over exaggeration. If they say they like to go to the gym but never seem to go and just want to eat takeaway and play computer games, it\u2019s worth noting as it can represent dishonesty or unmatched motivation and life goals so worth listening to your gut and potentially deciding to call it quits before you catch feelings.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Dating is difficult and finding the right person to have a long-term relationship is even harder.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n But it IS possible, and you definitely deserve love. So even if that little voice in your head says you are not worthy then I am here to tell you it\u2019s wrong. You are so special and made of the same stuff of the stars. You deserve all the love in the world.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Darlings the weather has officially turned. The heating is on and we are all feeling full of the joys of Autumn in \u2018The Essex\u2019 household at the moment. In dating terms, this time is called ‘Cuffing Season’. It means a time when singles come together for the warm winter months as cuddles and cosy nights […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":7109,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7156","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-features"],"yoast_head":"\n