This August marked 10 Years Being Married to my husband. I wanted to share with you my top tips for a successful marriage as well as all the details of the epic celebration we had.
By no means am I a relationship guru but having navigated through being with someone for 14 years, married for 10 years and 2 kids later, I feel I could share a little bit of insight. Of course, no marriage is perfect, and we have been through some ups and downs but we always come out of the other side stronger.
When I met my husband (in Aquum, Clapham, which was voted the worst nightclub in London!) he was like no other man I had met before – honest and forthcoming. There were certainly no games involved and he laid all his cards out on the table straight away which I found so refreshing. He literally whisked me off my feet and we fell in love very quickly. We have been through some tough times together, such as the death of his best friend, the stresses that his job entails and all the worry that children bring. The number one thing that we always make sure we do is communicate and listen to one another. It is so important to share how you are feeling and who better than your life partner?! This puts us in good stead to understanding each other and working through things. This can be very hard, especially as we all lead such busy lives. Date nights are key to us keeping the spark there and to also have a really good catch up! Whether it’s dinner at home or in London, I love making the effort and getting dressed up and having that 1:1 time with no distractions. It’s also a great way to share our common interest – food! Having time apart is also healthy and we both make sure that we do this too. This could be dinner or a weekend away with friends. He enjoys the quality time he spends with the children when I am away. We are equals in the relationship, especially when it comes to the children. In my opinion, Fathers are just as important as Mothers and are pillars in the development of a child’s well-being.
THE ANNIVERSARY BASH
For such a momentous occasion we decided it would be nice to celebrate and throw a party for our closest friends. We are both at a time in our lives where we have established really solid, beautiful friendships and we thought it would be a great time to have a party. If there is ever a time in your life when you want to see who your real friends are, an event like this certainly shows you. The reactions when we told friends, and the efforts that they made to attend, really blew us away.
We decided to do this at Inveraray Castle in Scotland. Why Scotland I hear you ask? My husband and I don’t have any Scottish roots but we do have a beautiful estate in the middle of the Scottish Highlands. We bought this in 2020 as an investment. It has certainly been a bit of a project for the last few years and we have many more years of work to get it to its full potential. ‘Rock Hill Farm’ exudes peace and tranquillity in the heart of The Highlands. Set over 130 acres of undulating ground it is completely private in a beautifully secluded location. Currently there are 2 Lochside self-catering lodges up and running, with access to a private Loch and stunning mountain views. We are currently renovating the original barn which we hope to convert to 8 bedrooms, complete with a secret cinema room.
PICTURE PERFECT SETTING
Whilst we had many visits up there, we literally stumbled across a castle in Inveraray which was 20 minutes away. Inveraray Castle has been the seat of the Dukes of Argyll, chiefs of Clan Campbell, since the 18thCentury. It is open to the public and the Duke and Duchess of Argyll reside there in a private wing. Set on 60,000 acres of land, it is an example of Gothic revival architecture. There is something about its fairytale façade that is simply magical. According to many it is actually haunted by a harpist who was hanged in 1644, but I didn’t tell my guests that!
It has been featured in the 2012 Christmas episode of Downton Abbey as “Duneagle Castle” as well as the exterior filming location for the BBC series “A very British Scandal”. Whilst we were being tourists and visiting the castle for the first time, I walked into the Armoury Hall and thought, “Wouldn’t it be amazing to have a party here”?! My Mother (an event planner) and I got to work and she helped to make it happen…
I was adamant that I did not want this to be another Wedding so we did not invite extended family or friends, just 50 of our close friends which was the perfect number for an intimate affair. We started with a champagne reception on the grounds with one of our favourite Champagnes Louis Roederer (this was also served at our Wedding) whilst a Cellist was serenading our guests on a stunning electric cello. The Gods were in our favour that day as it had miraculously stopped raining an hour before the event. For the call to dinner we had a Bagpiper to Pipe us all in. This was one of my highlights as it was so captivating and moving and a wonderful ode to Scotland. It really got the crown going, everyone was clapping and cheering. Dinner was served in the Salon on two long tables, dressed with fresh flowers and foliage, all green and white in clear crystal vases. Scattered amongst the flowers were candles filled with our bespoke Wedding scent by ‘Rachel Vosper Belgravia’. Whilst we ate the finest Scottish smoked salmon, sirloin of beef and chocolate mousse, we had the incredible pianist ‘Okiem’ playing cinematic classic music on the piano. Okiem is hugely talented, having toured on keyboards for many of the biggest artists in the music industry from Tinie Tempah to John Legend and Prince. This piano is steeped in history as it was used by American musical duo Lerner and Loewe who composed several of the songs for ‘My Fair Lady’.
SO ROMANTIC
I had a feeling that my husband was going to do a speech so I wanted to do something back for him but a little more unique. After months of planning with a projection mapping company, I managed to compile a slideshow of our lives together which was projected on to the facade of Inveraray Castle. The look on his face when I got up and told everyone to go outside was priceless! Nobody knew what to expect but it really was a spectacular way to show my love and appreciation to him. There were not many dry eyes in the house/castle after that!
PARTY TIME
Then it was time to PARTY, the part I was most looking forward to. We had bespoke cocktails made in a bar in the Armoury Hall including our version of an espresso martini which was made from cold brew coffee, vodka, coffee liquer and oat foam.
My cousin Andrea Zara (who is an awesome DJ) played all our favourite tunes from the 90s until now which got the crowd going. We partied the night away and nobody wanted it to end! Although we had to end it because we only had a licence until midnight…the party continued elsewhere involving the Loch Fyne Hotel, a dog, a bra and some contact lenses but that shall strictly remain an inside joke! Whilst we were having dinner I looked around and realised how lucky we are to have such wonderful and supportive friends in our lives, and most importantly how lucky we are to have each other.
